Train Wrecks among the Pop Stars

The phrase of the week among newscasters is “train wreck.” I counted eleven “train wrecks” in one six-minute segment of a news program yesterday. I think it started with the alleged crazy astronaut in diapers and then, of course, quickly switched to Anna Nicole, who was soon upstaged by the Brittney buzz cut. In between, we were treated to numerous references to other pop stars in and out of jail (and rehab) for drunken driving or drug-induced ticks—all of whom earned the adjectival “train wreck” or “train wreck waiting to happen.”

Can’t they stop? No, not the train wrecks. I really don’t care about them, although I’m beginning to wonder if “train wrecks” only reference females. I’m referring to the newscasters who spend weeks or months stomping the same horrible phrases into linguistic dust.

The Daily Show recently highlighted the use of “embolden” among politicians. I think someone taught Bush the big word and told him to start using it. I’m sure he practiced pronouncing it for many minutes before trying it in front of the news camera. Pleased with this new word, he used it over and over and over and over until all his cronies picked it up and “ran with it.”

I’ve got to stop listening to the news.

Ineffective/Ineffectual: Fraternal Twins

This morning, I heard a weathercaster on the CBS morning news say that the salt used to melt the ice in the streets was ineffectual. What? Didn’t he mean ineffective? Since most newscasters trip over their tongues trying to sound correct, I ran to my trusty Garner and the OED, just to be sure.

If something is ineffective, it means it has a low degree of success. So, the salt dumped on city streets by the NYC Dept. of Sanitation did melt some ice, but it didn’t melt it completely. It was only somewhat effective, because it didn’t produce the desired result, which was a100-percent ice melt.

Ineffectual is not the same as ineffective. “Ineffectual usually describes a person . . . ,” writes Garner. If our weathercaster had wanted to say mean things about the salt-truck drivers, he could have said they were ineffectual spreaders of salt, but I’m sure that’s not what he meant. Here’s the example in the OED: “”We spent a year . . . in a science class taken by an absurd and ineffectual master.”

Bryan A. Garner comes through once again. You should buy his book.